DISCIPLINING CHILDREN

I was raised in a home where the child was seen and not heard, just like the old adage. My Dad was tough on me, and we never were close until I was an adult, but it didn't cause even one major character flaw. All of my flaws, which are many, are my own invention.

The Bible says; "Spare the rod and spoil the child...". There are also a passages that exhort us not to despise the chastening of the Lord, for he skins us alive, every son whom He receiveth. I won't embark on a lengthy discourse on raising children, as though it would do any good! But we can ascertain from scripture that raising children right requires some paddling. Make that blistering that fat little fanny. No kid ever suffered for the tough discipline he got at home.

Mind you, I draw a distinction between legitimate discipline and abuse. Punishment should be administered in love. The objective of punishment is instruction, not inflicting pain. The discomfort is necessary to gain the attention of a kid before the age when reason can accomplish the same thing. This is an unfortunate characteristic of man, that fear must serve as a motivation in our youth. But a good parent tempers the dread of a spanking with love. The child has to learn that his folks love him, regardless of the occasional whupping. Eventually he will come to understand the subtleties of rearing a child, that his parents dislike punishment as much as he does, but the importance of learning about life makes it necessary to resort to those measures.

The society we have spawned makes it all the more harder to raise a child. At times my wife and I have the feeling that we aren't in control, no matter how tough we get. Today there is a culture that is exclusively for the young. They have their own fashions, colloquialisms, music, movies and material tastes, even their own vices. Much of this unnatural state of affairs has been created by anxious business interests who woke up to the fact that there are billions to be mined from America's young.

The effect has been to construct a wall between parents and children that makes communication extremely difficult. Resentment is a constant deterrent on their side of the wall. There always has been a distance between parents and child, particularly in the teen years, but that chasm has never been wider. The only certain solution is exposure to a prepared Pastor who teaches doctrine from the original languages. For that matter, this is the only solution to all our problems.


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