Chapter 4:
Fools By A Gorge

or

A Camping We Will Go

Well, Friday the 28th of June rolled around, and again, it was
time for me to make my way out of London and into the depths
of South-Western Ontario. Having made a whole load of preparations
ahead of time, and arranging for Curt to pick me up just after work,
of course, I was delayed at work. Both immediately before my
lunch break, and immediately before it was time to leave, as
luck would have it 3 kids walked in with new probation orders
or pre-disposition requests, and needed full intakes. This
meant that my lunch was delayed and I barely managed to
squeak out of work at 5:05pm.

Well, after a quick change and grabbing my stuff at the house,
we were soon flying down the 401 towards Guelph and the
Elora Gorge.

About halfway to Guelph, we saw a bunch of black smoke
and dust coming from under an overpass, an apparent result
of an accident, which seemed to have just occurred. As we got
closer, we saw that an SUV hauling a camping trailer had decided
to get up close and personal with the overpass itself, likely after
finding its way onto the shoulder and attempting to slow down.
We knew it had only occurred recently, as the traffic had only
had enough time to back up about 100 meters. Other than that,
traffic was relatively light, and we made it into the Grand River
Conservation Authority park at Elora Gorge with a couple of
hours of daylight left, and plenty of time to imbibe liquids to
help us to forget the events of the day.

Steve, his brother Geoff, Tim, Pretty-Boy and Jay were already
there, with a roaring campfire and the drinking well underway.

Curt, Jay, and Tim 39.01 KB

Tim teaches Grade 6 34.79 KB

Tim and Steve 34.67 KB

Curt and I added our camp chairs to the collection and started
on some beers, after I had my dinner of pasta salad that is.
A little while later, Karen showed up, helping to offset the
predominance of testosterone, although, she still fit in as
one of the boys, so, nothing really improved all that much.
After having a few beers, I decided it was time to set up the
tent, and so, I set up my tent in a spot that would be nice and
shady in the mornings, so I wouldn't have to worry about the
tent being too hot when I woke up. Then, it was back to the
campfire for more guy talk and more drinking, after lightly
spritzing some citronella spray I'd bought to keep the bugs
away. Well, it turns out the spray was a bit stronger than I'd
thought, as it could be smelled on the other side of the fire,
but, that was quickly forgotten, and we all talked and drank
until about midnight, when we all turned in, to be well rested
for tubing down the gorge the next morning.

Curt, Tim and myself looking pretty 38.91 KB

Jay and the Steering Column 39.19 KB

Steve, passed out 34.29 KB

Come Saturday morning, my stomach was feeling a little bit
tender, as it tends to do when I drink more beer than I really
should in a single evening, and the fact that I'd ended up
sleeping on my back didn't help that, or my need for liquids
too much. So, I cracked open a tin of peaches in syrup (thinking
it would be light syrup) and had my breakfast. Well, the syrup
was thicker than I thought it would be, although the peaches
tasted good. After breakfast, we drove, in Jay's truck, to the
main concession cabin to rent our tubing equipment. After
waiting in line for over an hour, and using the facilities a
couple of times, it was back to the campsite with our tubes,
helmets and life jackets. On one of the trips to the facilities,
I noticed myself in the mirror, with my glasses and silly hat
on. Instantly, I recognised what I looked like, and I decided
that the moustache is going to have to be removed, one of
these days. Looking at myself in the mirror, I realised I bore
a striking resemblance to that actor who plays a camp counsellor
with an annoying voice, who has appeared in so many camping
movies. I think he may also have been involved in various
furniture store and Maytag commercials. Regardless, the
moustache is on its way out the door, slowly, but it's on its way.

Once we got back to the campsites, it was time to change and
put in my contacts, and then we went down to the low-water
bridge to catch the bus up to the start of the tubing run.

Tim in the morning 68.09 KB

Steve grabbing some grub 68.18 KB

Well, we got to the start of the tubing run, stepped in the
water, and we all started talking in soprano. The water
was not merely chilly, it was positively frigid! Consoling
ourselves that the cold would simply numb our bodies to
itself, we gingerly sat down into our inner tubes and went
on our way downstream.

Holy CRAP! That's COLD! 55.62 KB

Drifting... Not getting warmer yet 52.42 KB

The first rapids 62.96 KB

The journey was absolutely beautiful, with a couple of
waterfalls, some really cool rock formations and some
really fun rapids. Well, I took my camera along in a semi-
water-proof fanny-pack, along with my wallet, which I had
forgotten was in there.

Floating along 57.98 KB	Neat rock shelf 48.38 KB	"Ride on" 50.16 KB
Sloping banks of the Grand 56.99 KB	Non-sloping banks... 61.12 KB	Floating merrily again 52.01 KB

Well, I got some good pictures of the river, the scenery,
as well as everyone floating in their tubes, or swimming
after them.

Waterfall 57.56 KB	Someone walking by the fall 72.49 KB	Straight-on pic of the fall 58.25 KB
Jay, swimming after his tube 69.25 KB	Still swimming... 59.88 KB	Jay, happily back on his tube 58.89 KB

However, I hit one rapid the wrong way, and found myself
swimming along with my tube for a little bit, and my camera
is merely water resistant, not water proof. This wasn't really
a big problem, although, it did result in the camera becoming
self-activated once we got back to the campsites.

Fully... 45.28 KB

...Automatic... 31.09 KB

...Camera 45.23 KB

After we got back to the campsites, we settled in to have some
lunch, and Curt, who had gotten hurt during the first set of rapids
and ended up having to walk back to the sites, began some
drinking to numb the pain. In short time, Karen had to leave
to go to work, and Jeff and Susan arrived. Well, we decided
to do one final tube run to end off the day, and Jeff joined us,
using Karen's tube, life jacket and helmet. I decided to leave
the camera back at the main campsite, to finish off the roll on
its own. Curt also decided to stay back, to concentrate on numbing
the pain from his fall from his tube, and his legs getting bashed
about.

Jeff at lunch 45.71 KB

Curt applying Beer therapy 56.65 KB

Relaxin' and reading with lunch 62.88 KB

Well, it was another fun ride down the river, although, there was
a general consensus that it would have been more fun if there
had have been a greater number of rapids.

The Steerning Column 64.23 KB

Steve and the Column 60.33 KB

After returning the tubes and other gear, Curt, Jay and I all headed
to Guelph in Jay's truck, to get some ice, food and groceries. We
were really ruffing it, as you can no doubt tell. Curt and Jay got
some food at a Harvey's, and then we zipped across to the No
Frills to get some camp food. Well, Curt got himself a steak for
dinner, along with some stuff for the next couple of days, and I
got some veggie burgers, cheese rolls, a mammoth jug of grapefruit
juice, a bottle of water (as the water on our side of the river was
undrinkable) and a big bag of chips. Fully prepared for the rest
of the night, we headed back to camp, and made our dinner.

Fire becomes smoke... 59.09 KB

...Smoke repels people 57.89 KB

Fire returns, smoke is banished. 68.54 KB

The group again talked late into the night around the campfire,
adding to its ranks with Scotty, who had just come in from London,
and Justin (VW Boy), a Stratford native that the group had met last
year, because of his dune-buggie'd VW bug. Well, we all had some
good laughs, especially at the expense of some campers down the
road who got busted by the park rangers for playing some really bad
music loudly, when we were in a no radio zone. They had then,
apparently, asked the rangers for help, as they were unable to start a
fire on their own.

Sunday came, and with it, much bumming around, chatting, and not a
lot of doing stuff. Jeff, Susan, Scotty and Jay decided to take another
go at the tubing game, with Jay and Scotty buying their own inner tubes,
and just renting life jackets (coming prepared with their own helmets),
and Jeff and Susan managing to rent them from the concession, after
they had been returned by earlier tubers. Well, on their first run down
the river, Steve decided to throw Jay a beer from the point overlooking
it by our campsite. The can sailed majestically through the air, spinning
in the sun, and came crashing down into the river mere feet from Jay,
who quickly recovered it, drinking the one mouthful of beer remaining in
the can, which had burst open on impact. One of the kids from a
neighbouring site asked if we had thrown a can of pop to Jay, so, we
lied, and said that yes, we had thrown Jay a can of pop.

After dinner (mmmmmm, veggie dogs and chips - can you say "healthy"
boys and girls?), Jeff and Susan played euchre against Steve and I,
trouncing us thoroughly the first game (10 to 2) and not so thoroughly
the second game (I think we had 5 points). After that, we moved back
to the ring around the fire, and found out that Scotty had talked to the
people who had been playing the bad music the night before. It turns
out that the ranger who had helped them with the campfire was also
named Scott, and looked very similar to Scotty. Well, they were invited
to join us at our campfire, and they did a bit later on that night. And so,
we met Romi, Sheri, Dan and Dan's girlfriend, whose name I can't recall,
but who did not make a great impression on a few members of our party,
all of which were from London. Well, Sheri wasn't feeling too well, and
so she headed back to their campsite shortly after arriving, to go to bed
and get some sleep. Romi stayed and talked with Scotty, and it looked
like they were hitting it off pretty well. Dan and his girlfriend stayed as
well, and did all the talking for everyone, or rather, Dan's girlfriend did.
Eventually though, everyone drifted off to get some sleep, as we had to
be all packed up and off the sites by 12:00 on Monday.

On Monday, I dragged the fly off my tent nice and early, and set it on the
picnic table to dry, as it was soaked with dew. Everyone slowly got up,
had some non-alcoholic beverages to drink, and went about cleaning up
the campsites and packing their stuff up. The steering column that Curt
had forgotten in his trunk on the way up, and which every member of the
camp was told they had to have their picture taken with, found its way into
the dumpster, its final resting place, for now, and we cleared all of the melted
cans and bottles that were no longer glowing out of the fire pit. Once
everything was all packed up, we were on our way to Guelph for brunch at
Wimpy's.

After we all consumed our grease for the week, we headed back home, Steve
passing Curt and me on the expressway to the 401, and Scotty zipping by on
the 401 itself. When we got back to my place, Curt and I unloaded all of my
stuff from the car onto the boulevard, I invited him in for a drink, but, he
declined, saying that he had to get home and was thinking of working out. For
my part, I went into the house, which was actually cooler than outside, for a
change, put all my camping clothes into the laundry, and had a long shower, in
an attempt to feel a little bit more human. Humanity returned, I went back upstairs,
and Amanda asked me "Who was that who dropped you off?” Well, I told them it
was my friend Curt, and she told me that the other girls had said that they thought
he was hot.

Well, that night, Amanda, her friend Kascha and I drove down to Harris Park and
caught the fire-works, or rather, what we could see of the fireworks, around the
people who decided they were going to stand right in front of us. I still have the
image burnt into my retinas of one quite large lady bending over in front of me,
allowing me to see the fireworks crest over a nearly full moon.

Now there's an image I wish I could forget.


Previous Chapter: Summer 2002, Chapter 3 - Ministry of Silly Hats

Next Chapter: Summer 2002, Chapter 5 - Danger! Danger Will Robinson!



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