The Teams

The Enemies

The Neutrals

The Places

The History

The Artwork

The Stories

The Comics

The

Misc.

The Arsenal:

Where would Batman be without his Batarangs or the Batmobile? Where would the Green Lantern be without that weird ring of his? Would Luke Skywalker be the same without his trusty lightsabre? And because my pop. cultural knowledge is lacking, I'm running out of comparisons. But the main message is there, whether it's a high tech piece of sophisticated weaponry or simply a cool way to get about where would our heroes be without their equipment? The Boob Squad are no different, each equipped with their own weaponry and special gizmos specifically created for them by Captain Malkarris, the teams mechanic.

The Boob Squad ~ The Junior Squad ~ Team Silicone ~ The Triad  ~ Associates ~ Neutrals

The Boob Squad:

Most of the Boob Squad's equipment is specially and specifically designed for them by Captain Malkarris. They have a powerful and deadly array of weaponry, but refuse to wield guns preferring the more traditional techniques and weapons but also because it is against the hero code of honor to wield any weapon that can blow a hole through their enemies head.

SuperBoob:

Anti-Enhancement Knitting Needles - Generally just referred to as 'Knitting Needles', these were Superboob's first weapon in the fight against artificial enhancement, long before she made a personal enemy of Madam Silicone. Back then, prior to such techniques as levitation and shielding, Superboob was pretty much just a girl with delusions of superheroic grandeur. Boobtopia, being a predominantly peaceful place, boasted no real supervillains or diabolical plots, but true to its nature, there was an insidious evil creeping into the population, unnoticed by the eyes of the law. This evil paraded itself inside artificial enhancement, and defied authorities in that it masqueraded as simple AE, of the sort found in the rest of the world. Lacking any combat training, nifty gadgets, or even an appropriate name or costume, she still took to the streets of Boobtopia, brandishing the vaingloriously named 'Anti-Enhancement Knitting Needles' as her weapon of choice. In truth, they were just an ordinary, if overlong set of Knitting Needles found in a box at the back of her closet. This showed up terribly in her heroic crusade. Superboob's early career was a shambles. Though she rooted out several clusters of nameless Silicone Men and Fembots that insinuated a much larger threat than anyone realised, she still got her butt was whupped repeatedly. It was not until she found herself a superheroing mentor that she turned things around, reinventing herself as a serious superheroine and eventually going on to found the Boob Squad. She still keeps the Knitting Needles around, though, to remind herself of less successful days and, in a pinch, to stick in fake boobs and skewer silicone packages with. She keeps one down the front of each boot, parallel to her shins. 

Underwire Katana - Primary weapon of choice, the Underwire Katana were given to Superboob by her mentor, Su Pah-hiro. Years ago, Pah-hiro, a woman of mystery, found the unsuccessful and inexperienced Superboob having a can of whup-ass opened on her by a batch of Fembots. She used the Katana to rescue the wannabe superheroine, and, after listening to Superboob's story, decided to train her in the ways of Bu-Bi, an ancient discipline known to few that originated in the hard-to-reach valleys on the outskirts of Boobtopia. Training was harsh and gruelling, but after years under the expert tutelege of Pah-hiro, Superboob eventually mastered the art of Bu-Bi. It was from Pah-hiro that she learned shield and levitation, as well as the range of martial arts which she now employs in the fight against Madam Silicone. However, just as she was nearing the end of her training, Superboob's idyllic valley life was interrupted by Pah-hiro's own personal enemies, the Ki-ho clan. Pah-hiro and their leader, Skang Ki-ho, clashed and fought, culminating in a pyrric victory, whereupon Skang Ki-ho was defeated and the remaining clan members dispersed or dead. Pah-hiro later died of a mortal wound received in the fight, and presented Superboob with the Underwire Katana on her deathbed. Having nothing left to keep her in the valley, Superboob went back to Boobtopia, where she found artificial enhancement on the rise thanks to a clever advertising scheme that had sprung up in the years she was away. A scheme set up by one Madam Silicone. The rest, as they say, is history.

Tiny Tits: 

Considering Tiny Tits is physically the weakest member of the Boob Squad, she has to make up for it in another way.  So aside from her fighting skills and mental prowess, Tiny tit's is the owner of the Utility bra. Tiny Tit's Utility Bra was given to her by a Japanese Master (these guys pop up everywhere) She uses it to reach Handbag space, which is like Pocket space only more Feminine. You know when a woman has a handbag and she puts everything, EVERYTHING in it? Well, it's like that only it's kept in a specially designed Bra! Tiny Tits can pull out as many items as she wants from it (though, obviously, she has to put in in first, for this reason she tends to work closely with Malk.) While she's been known for keeping many different, bizarre things down her bra her most popular items are:
-A sleeping mask
-A tin of Altoids
-A tube of lube
-A vibrator
-Several condoms, which Sealeaf seems to think are tasty
-A Boob-Boob
-A pair of handcuffs
-A feather
-A can of E-Z Whip
-A breast pump  

 Boobs O'Death:

Besides using her Hypnoboobs to control her enemies, Boobs O' Death is armed to the teeth with deadly weaponry she's just itching to use on the unsuspecting henchman. A bra whip, stilettos of death, boob-a-rangs and a protective cape are the weapons she normally carries though goddess only knows where she carries them. The Bra whip is a sleek powerful weapon and Boobs O'Death wields it so well she puts Indiana Jones to shame, using it to disarm her opponents as well as ensnarling limbs and cutting them. Next on her list of favourite weapons is her stilettos of death. Ever been stepped on by a women with a stiletto heel? Then you should know the excruciating pain that comes from those little shoes. Boobs O'Deaths however are razor sharp and made of  state of the art alloys that make them strong and unbreakable. The Boob-a-rangs are as the name suggests, sharp deadly boomarangs kept in her bra for easy accessibility. In a split second Boobs O'Death can wipe these steel tipped boomarangs out and throw them with unwavering accuracy at her target. She rarely misses and the razor sharp weapons return to her expert hands straight after for another throw. Finally Boobs O'Death is equipped with a protective cape. Made from enhanced polyfibres that are as strong as Kevlar, resistant to heat and cold, flexible to allow maximum movement and as soft as silk this cape protects the heroine from any and all blasts, lasers, falling debris and whatever is shot at her. 

Lady Boobsalot:

Though protected by the devastating and slightly icky Menstrual cyclone Lady Boobsaloot is not the best hand to hand fighter and so is venerable in a battle. Taking this into consideration the group agreed that she would be the Boob Squader to wield the Inappropriate Phallic Sword. The Inappropriate Phallic Sword is the most powerful weapon that the Boob Squad owns and could be the most powerful weapon on the Earth itself. Razor sharp edges that are so fine it can cut light itself as well as being made from ancient metals forged, legends claims, by the gods themselves and handed down to the most skilled warriors of the ages. The Phallic Sword can never be beaten, not without some kind of nuclear blast and physicists predict that even that would do little more than scratch the surface of the sword. 

Jiggle Jugs:

Jiggle is much more of a peace maker than a fighter, and so her arsenal is not quite as deadly as the others. But that is not to say it isn't as useful. Armed with anti-enhancement boots, the powerful Rose Petal Whip and also a little dragon named Sealeaf she can be pretty scary if she wants to. The Anti-enhancement boots where created specifically for her by Malkarris, and can pierce any implant that can be created, an excellent weapon in the fight against Team Silicone's enhanced Henchmen. She also wields the Rose Petal Whip, which gives a whole new definition to the phrase "flower power" the whip cracks and instantly thousands of rose petals are scattered everywhere, the fine flower petals are of a special breed of rose that has sharp edges and can cut through skin with ease, cutting and slicing her enemies. Though not a man-made weapon, Sealeaf Jiggle Jugs pet dragon, can be as dangerous as any other piece of equipment the Boob Squad wields. Easily discarded due to his size, Sealeaf can grow to twice his height and use his strong jaws and teeth to latch onto his mistress' enemies tackling to the ground in a way that would sent police dogs running for cover.

The Junior Squad:

It was a controversial topic within the Boob Squad whether or not to let the Junior Squaders carry weaponry. It was feared the younger members would not act responsibly enough to carry the weapons or that they could injure themselves and others because of their inexperience. However SuperBoob gave the final word and allowed the Junior Squaders an array of weaponry to use as long as they promised only to use it as a last resort. Though none of them wield anything as powerful as the Inappropriate Phallic Sword, their weapons should never be underestimated. 

Knockerellla:

The leader of the Junior squad, Knockerella isn't that well endowed compared to some of the others. A skinny girl she may be, but she isn't lacking in physical strength and can put one hell of a force behind her Boob staff. The staff is around 5ft long and carved from a light wood, it is strong, durable and can decapaciatate her enemies in a few swift hits. Knockerella wields this staff with a masters hand using it not only as an offensive weapon but to protect herself and her comrades as well. But that's not all. This little leaguer is also armed with the spikes of Truth and Justice, two specially designed metal spikes that can be used to puncture and deflated any of the special projects Team Silicone can come up with.

Glass-Cutter Nipples:

Poor Nips has been trying to be allowed to use the Inappropriate Phallic Sword for ages now, coming up with many ways to try to get the sword but never really succeeding. However she does find comfort in the fact that in her makeup bag there is a deadly array of arsenal just waiting to be employed onto the battle field. her Gloss of Light might look like ordinary light gloss but when applied blinds her enemies from the sheen can incapacitates them so she can deliver vicious stabs with the Nail files of pain. The sharp, thin nail files are light and easy to carry and Nips loves to use them as throwing instruments to impale her enemies to the walls and put them out of the game for good.

Titty Boom:

Titty Boom is a pretty frightening little girl. Some girls have stunning looks, others have killer personalities but Titty Boom is armed with two Tit lasers that are guaranteed to blow any guys mind. The twin lasers are an invention of Malkarris', one of his pride and joys actually, and their settings can be changed from "raw" to "crispy" depending on the degree of evil being fought. The lasers themselves are expertly hidden in Titty Boom's cleavage, so it's hard to get her away from them.

Enough about Weapons, sure it's all fine and well being able to blast the brains out of your enemies, but how are you going to do that when your enemy is half way across the globe from you? For this reason Malkarris put his history of aeronautics into action and created the Boobplane. 

Team Silicone:

Of course it's not just the good girls that get all the goodies, the bad girls like to play too. Death Stars and Mega Rocket Launchers aside, every villain needs a easily accessible weapon to wield in order to fight those do-gooders when there isn't enough time to just blow them all to bits.

Madam Silicone:

The Scalpel of Lies, supposedly the only weapon that can stand up to the Phallic sword or the Underwire Katana's in a fight, happens to belong to this psychopath. The origins of this fearsome weapon were never clear, all we know is that it was initially intended to be a weapon for good but Madam Silicone got her hands on it  (after killing a hefty number of people in order too) she used it to further her evil ways. The Scalpel has a unnatural black sheen to it, and can easily slice through skin and bone with little effort. Anything that stands in its way is instantly shredded by it's blade and Madam Silicone would love nothing more than to use it to decipitate the Boob Squaders one by one.

BoobJob:

Leader of Team Silicones private army, this girl is armed to the teeth with high tech weaponry and gizmos all intended to do one thing: bring her opponents to their knees screaming in agony and pain. Boobjob is smarter than your average villain though and knows firsthand that emotional pain can be just as deadly as physical, so one of her weapons is the devastating ray of self loathing. A simple blast from this ray gun can turn even the most self confident of people into cowering wrecks, it's been known to cause even the most emotionless of people to break into tears of self hatred and loathing. If that doesn't work however, Boobjob has her boobzooka as backup. The Boobzooka is easily transported and carried, and when used can blow an entire landscape to bits. Using only the most explosive of explosives, Boobjob ensures that when she hits a heroine they wont be getting up again for a long time, that is if they can find all their limbs after the dust clears. Finally, as if boobzooka's and mind bending ray guns weren't enough, Boobjob keeps a supply of blades handy just in case the fighting gets too close for comfort. An expert in hand to hand, and a master at knife fighting Boobjob wields her blades with deadly skill, slicing and cutting her opponents into little cubes within seconds if she gets the chance.

Dr. Silica Augmentia:

Standing 6ft tall, Dr. Augmentia already has a natural advantage at hand to hand combat, but just in case her strength and fighting sense fails she has an arsenal of interesting and horrifying tools waiting in the wings. Her Botox blow gun is one pretty scary weapon, able to instantly paralyze her enemy with one shot of botox leaving them like that for hours until it wears off. Her accurate aim never misses and if she's aiming at you, you might as well just run while you can. Projectiles aside, Dr Augmentia is still a fearsome foe. She wields the Mace of Inadequacy which as well as cracking bones if she hits you will cause the poor victim to feel extreme self consciousness and saps the confidence without their notice. Both these weapons make Dr Augmentia a scary opponent to face, just add in her insanity and you've got a true crusader for evil.

The Triad:

Associates:

While not maybe not as vital to the combat as the weaponry of the main protagonists and antagonists, the two sides associates still carry an explosive and deadly supply of weaponry that they need to use in order to keep themselves alive and to disable their opponents as quickly as possible

Captain Malkarris:

Armed with his brain rather than his brawn, Malk prefers to use weaponry of his own creation in order to take down his enemies or else use the environment around himself to give him the upper hand. At all time he can be found with a few screwdrivers, a spanner and a engineers square all of which he can use as a deadly weapon to disable his enemies.

As a member of the military before being transferred Ealasaid is a master of firearms as well as unarmed combat. Now that she is a member of the police she is never without her mandatory sidearm as well as a small revolver and a few blades hidden on her person.

Yodel Bean is armed with his trusty mop and bucket, a deadly combination in the hands of this skilled expert though he doesn't like to get involved too much in the fighting. He's also armed with a constantly replenishing medical kit that never runs out and seems to contain everything you could ever possibly need. Apart from that his foul mouth could probably be classified as a weapon, his uncouth language has been known to cause his enemies to flee before him before the swords have even been drawn.

Tergon's a chief and so spends a lot of his time in the kitchen. Of course anyone who has ever been in a kitchen knows that kitchens are places of death and are virtually a medieval armoury of bizarre and painful weapons. If anyone invades his sacred cooking space Tergon is known to use any and all available cooking utensils with deadly force. He prefers the good ol'fashioned frying pan, useful for knocking out intruders and also the common spatula with which he can out fence even some of the most skillful swordsmen (and women).

Neutrals:

It's not just the Super heroines and the Evil Villains that get weaponry and cool gadgets of course. Some of the other members of Boobtopia that regularly get dragged into the Boob Wars have some tools in order to protect themselves from the collateral damage the two groups cause in their regular brawls.

Emmy:

Emmy has a Gender Bender Wand, which she'll use on anyone that means ANYONE who tries to trash her store. Boob Squader, Team Silicone member, Leather Lad, police officer, little child, nuns. Anyone who threatens her place of business will get a blast from this magical item from her home land. As the name suggests the Gender Bender Wand changes the gender of whoever it hits, it has two settings: mental and physical. The first changes the mentality of the victim, so they think they are the opposite gender. The second actually changes their body. Both cause great confusion and embarrassment. From what we've been able to figure out, it is theoretically reversible. Somehow. Emmy hasn't revealed exactly how to return the person to normal, and no one's really willing to test the theory.

Andrew Sekrist and Oran Gatan:

Though these two never get into combat situations and don't wield any weapons, they are armed with a Dictaphone and a camera at all times. These two instruments can be more useful and sometimes more damaging than any gun or sword when in the hands of these two experts.